By: Melanin Reigns

Where did the misconception that our bodies can be bartered for love begin? Perhaps it has never been a conscious thought of our own but what does our patterns and day to day habits reveal about us? . . .

Pace yourself
This is not another "one night stand" shaming blog, but in truth, how many women walk away from one night stands feeling refreshed thus looking for nothing further. . .?

NOT MANY. .
It's unnatural for divine creators to take energy from a source and not want to manifest something greater, to be shared amongst the rightful lender and broader community. However, a woman must keep in mind that just because a man (or woman taking upon the energy of a masculine vessel) beds you, it does not ensure that they are willing to co create with you on any level.

Why Does It Matter?
One word: EXPECTATIONS
Avoid them at all cost
Expectation is the first stepping stone to disappointment.
Too often sisters operate in the mindset that if they offer their vagina to someone; that person is in turn, indebted to love or even maintain communication with them.

FALSE
My advice to you is to know yourself.
Know your wants, needs, insecurities, shortcomings and your strengths.
This makes all of the difference when approaching intimate matters outside of self. Knowing the root of your urges and behaviors will help you identify if you're being led by your spirit or your wounds.
After all, the word intimacy phonetically defines itself as: IN TO ME I SEE.

Your vagina is not and will never be an offering or ticket for a man or masculine vessel to see the rest of you. I promise, sex on the first date isn't the issue. Sex as a tradeoff for the protection and provisions of a man is.

So what's your best option?
Do not expect, EXPERIENCE!

Take a deep breath, you no longer have to hold yourself hostage to the spell of emotional and mental codependency.
You are free to choose what is best for you, and I mean ALWAYS choose what is best for you.

How can you be sure?
eciprocity . .

It is no secret that new age women give too much of themselves, sexually, emotionally and financially; in hopes of acquiring what seems to be the unattainable in this generation.
Genuine, patient and consistent love.

However, what is settled for majority of the time falls short of just that. Most relationships and bonds are formed of attachment, the illusion of comfortability, and codependency. Be sure that the circulation of energy is healthy.

As receivers, we must be extremely careful what we are allowing into our space.
It's best not to compromise out of sexual starvation!

Maintaining a level of sexual discipline will keep your thinking clear.
Ask yourself, "Am I being led by my spirit or my wounds?"
"Will this interaction benefit me or will I regret it after?" "Will the person I am thinking of compromising for, value and appreciate my mind, body, and soul?" And lastly "Am I willing to share this bond with someone without possession?"

Have a conversation with your higher and lower self, in order to find your balance but most importantly; refrain from bartering your body in hopes of gaining love.

The temple of God resides within each of us.